Who needs sleep?

Ok, I've already talked about this once before, but seriously, what is my problem? I haven't been to bed before 1 a.m. in the last three weeks. I'm still blaming it on daylight savings, but really, I should have adjusted by now, right?

I don't know what it is. A couple weeks ago, I went on a business trip. We drove to Durango, Colorado. (That's right, DROVE.) The whole drive, I slept. One of the coworkers I went with even said I have vehicular narcolepsy. But the point is, I slept a whole bunch that weekend, which is usually all I need to catch up and I'm good. It doesn't help to go to bed at 3 a.m. the next three days, I guess.

So does anyone have any advice? What can I do to get to bed on time??

Saint Pat's

It's late, but I gotta write about the St. Patrick's Day party I went to on Saturday.

We started the night off by kissing the Blarney Stone. Upside down, which I found out later is the preferred method for kissing Blarney Stones.

Then we went on a St. Patrick's treasure hunt. I was grouped with Caron and her friend from work. We were lucky enough to get the only green colored clues, which was an excellent omen. After breaking a few minor traffic laws and running all around West Jordan, we found the pot of gold first! Go Team Green!

The second best part of the night was the Irish jig instruction and subsequent competition. Emma has been taking Scottish and Irish dancing lessons and was gracious enough to share her newfound talent with the group. I've got a few videos. As usual, they sorta suck as they were taken with my cell phone, but it's still fun to watch.

After performing a little Irish hard shoe dance, Emma taught everyone how to do a basic jig. It started with a basic step, that Christy and Krista learned pretty quickly. They even made their own little dance in a circle.

Once everyone had the basic step, Emma taught a few more steps, and everyone got involved.

So once everyone was happily jigging in the living room, there was a little competition.

The winner got an Irish shot glass. How very appropriate. Which leads to the funnest part of the night.

Before I tell you about it, I feel I must give a little background. I may or may not have told you about "The Fridge Game." If I haven't, the basic premise is that you label seemingly random items in your refrigerator from 2-12, roll some dice, then you have to eat a spoonful of whatever you roll. It could be anything from cool whip to lemon garlic marinade. It's a touch insane, but very fun. But oddly enough, I can never get anyone to play!

So, seeing as St. Patrick's Day is an Irish holiday and the Irish are known for their drinking, we played a little drinking game. (Don't worry Mom, fam, and other concerned readers, no alcohol was involved.) This game involves filling 6 shot glasses with various liquids. You roll the die and you have to drink the glass labeled with your corresponding number. If the glass is empty, you get to fill it with whatever you want, and can mix and match liquids. For example, glass 3 is filled with water. I roll a 3 and I drink the water. Sally, who is next, also rolls a 3. Because the glass is now empty, she doesn't have to drink anything, but adds grape juice to the empty shot glass. And so on.

Because we had no alcohol, we got a little creative with our liquids. We had green punch, water, grape juice, hot chocolate, salsa, chicken broth, ginger ale, and redi-whip. (You see how this relates to The Fridge Game now?)

Here you have hot chocolate, water, grape juice, salsa, green punch, and chicken broth

You may be saying, "But Garrett, that's more than six! How does that work with only six shot glasses?" My answer, dear reader, is that--as stated earlier--the rules allow mixing and matching liquids. For example, I had to drink a shot of chicken broth, salsa, and grape juice topped with redi-whip. In the words of Rachel Ray, "Yummo!" And believe me, it only got worse. By the end, solids started getting added to our shots-things like peas and chocolate. Oh, and a blueberry muffin.

Everyone had a good time, though, and it's the closest I've ever gotten to getting people to play The Fridge Game. A few folks were really stressed over having to drink some of those crazy mixed shots, and there were always shouts and laughter as we watched our buddies choke down each swallow. It was some crazy fun, though!

P.S. Photos completely and utterly stolen from Christy's Blog. Thanks Christy!

Dáme la abuela naraja

Ok, this may be really stupid to the rest of you, but I was rolling on the floor!

One semester of Spanish, Spanish love song

If you don't think it's funny, here are a few reasons why I think it is:
1 - At most family gatherings, my sister--thanks to cheesy Spanish soap operas and the fact that I served a Spanish speaking mission--often says with very dramatic emphasis the phrases "No fumar en el baño!" and "¿Que hora es?" and it's funny every time.
2 - In college, my roommate Jared used to say nonsensical phrases in Spanish, including the title of this blog post, which means, "Give me the orange grandmother." Oh, and "¿Como estás, el baño?" which means, "How are you, the bathroom?" It is also funny every time.
3 - The guy ends the video by saying, "Au revoir."
4 - I never took Spanish (not even one semester), but people I know who have taken Spanish classes don't know much more than the phrases this guy sings.
5 - By the end of the video, the guy's nipple kinda sneaks out of his very loosely buttoned shirt.

If you need more reasons than that (and there are plenty of reasons beyond those 5), you're sense of humor is broken and I can do nothing for you. Hope you liked the video!

Kinda embarrassed

As you can see, I've updated my blog layout. It's cool, huh? But that's not why I'm embarrassed.

While changing my layout, I also looked at some of my old posts and found multiple spelling and grammar errors. Because I majored in English and because I went off on proper use of the English language once on my blog, I feel like I'm held at a higher standard... well, turns out I'm human and make mistakes, even in writing. Forgive me?

Future rock star!

Yesterday was McKay's birthday (happy birthday, the-K!) and tonight my family had a little surprise birthday party for him. We fooled him into thinking it was just dinner at Jared and Liz's place, but we had pie, lasagna, and made him bring Rock Band. If you've never played, you really should. It's a great time. But the best of all was my niece rockin' on the drums. She's usually on the beat, too! It's just too cute to not share, so here are a few videos I took.

Are you kidding me?!

Check this out.
What is WRONG with people? This is even worse than those stupid decals that have little stick figures for every member of your family... and your dogs if you are really crazy. First, why, in this world of fraud and identity theft, would you advertise to strangers to know your name? Come on Travis and Lindy... On top of that, this car is parked in its covered spot, labeled with their house number. So now people know where Travis and Lindy live, their first names, what kind of car they drive, and the license plate.

Second, it's totally lame. It's like rednecks who get tatoos of their third wife's name on their butt. Or those custom license plates like the one I saw tonight that said AXCELR8R. It was a Mazda sports car of some kind, but really? Not only do you have to get a stupid sports car to make up for whatever insecurity you've got, you have to flaunt it even more by pointing out that sports cars are supposed to go fast... oh brother...

Anyway, thought I'd share the photo... and rant for a bit.

Update

...I have nothing new to report... Except maybe this new email group I've been invited to. A bunch of friends of mine who are also stuck in front of a computer all day have decided to email each other all day long. It's a nice distraction, especially while work is so slow right now. And it's also getting me all sorts of music to listen to at work, because everyone has music at work, and finds it necessary to share songs that are particularly applicable to the conversation.

I know, I'm boring. But I at least should give you a picture to think about. So here it is.


I don't have much else to tell y'all about, but hope ya have a happy weekend!

The definition of insanity

A couple of weeks ago, I had plans for two get-togethers at my place. One was to enjoy LOST, the other to watch a movie. To advertise, I sent out a mass email and a mass text. I have used these methods to recruit people to attend various other events, and have found them to be quite ineffective. But I still used them.

And the grand total attending my LOST party: Three, including me. (Thanks for coming Tiffany and Katey! You guys are great. And don't even worry about the spill, it's completely gone. I don't think my roommates even know anything happened.)

The grand total attending movie night: Three, including me. (Thanks for coming Emma and Jenni! The company was even better than the smoothies!!)

So why do I keep using this method to get people to come to crap? It obviously doesn't work, and you inevitably get people whining about how they didn't get the opportunity to ignore your invite. So not only is your party poorly attended, you've lost some friends. I understand that the content and purpose of the get-together is of key importance (some may not endure David Bowie in tights, awe-inspiring eye makeup, and sweet 80s hair, even if Jennifer Connelley is a lifelong crush), but why won't anyone come? Any ideas? Or ideas on how I can more effectively invite people to stuff? Why didn't YOU, dear reader, come to my party? :-(

I've been duped

With just one single purchase, I've been completely had. Let me explain.

A couple weeks ago, a coworker of mine told me about some famous popcorn made in the fair city of Chicago. It's so good, people wait in long lines to get it, it's been on Oprah's Favorite Things list twice, and is lovingly revered by Halle Berry. More importantly, I asked my good friend Brookey about it (she's from Chicago), and she says it's great.

Well, I looked at prices online and they were a little out of control. But with such great endorsements, I was still intrigued. Add to this that the brand name of this popcorn is Garrett and you can have it shipped to you in an orange tin, and I was sold. I talked to the coworker who told me about the popcorn, we ordered some, and had it sent to work. I'm not going to tell you how much it cost, but here's a picture of the tin.


I have to admit, that's a freakin' awesome tin. And really, I have to keep telling myself that, because it's the best part.

I don't mean to discredit Oprah, Halle, or even Brookey, but this popcorn is just ok. Have a look see.

It's basically a step up from the ten dollar tins you can get at Christmastime. I guess that must be why they like it, but I thought it was only ok. I think the real reason I was not as impressed is because I paid so friggin' much for it. And in defense of Oprah, Halle, and Brookey, my popcorn was not really fresh, having been shipped from Chicago seven days after it was made. I'd still be willing to give the popcorn a shot if I ever visit, but local prices better be a little more reasonable.

Luckily, my coworker and I shared the cost, and I got to keep the tin. So I don't feel quite as screwed as I could have been, but it's still a little embarrassing. So, anyone have any ideas of what I can do with this sweet orange tin that bares my name?

I heart LOST

No, really, I do. I know there are a few of you out there that hate the "I heart" thing, but I'm a big fan of it. And I'm an even bigger fan of LOST (which you can see on ABC Thursday nights 9 - 8 central or online at abc.com.)

I am so into the crazy show that I sent a mass email in a sans-serif font announcing a little get together to watch the season four premiere at my place. I even created my own Dharma rations to celebrate.

I'd love to claim that all the Dharma labels were my idea, but I sorta stole it from Emma, who had a LOST party for last season's finale.

There are a lot of people out there that don't get the show, but I think it's great. The back stories are all very interesting, the characters actually have some depth, and I'm intrigued by the mystery of how their lives have intertwined and how they've all been drawn together. Then there's the island and all its mysteries. I'm really hooked.

I know that the show has gotten a little weirder with each season, but I'm still addicted. I even realize when I'm trying to explain the plot or summarize the show to non-watchers that it sounds a little hokey. (All these people crashed on an island. Their lives are inter-related, but it's unclear how or why. These numbers, 4 - 8 - 15 - 16 - 23 - 42, seem to be real important. The island can heal people, like Locke who was a paraplegic, and Rose who had cancer. Oh, and there's this weird smoke monster... and even weirder "others" that live on the island, but don't want people to know about it... lost you already, huh? Pun intended...) But I don't care. There were even a few things that happened during the premiere episode this season that bug me and I don't even care about them (like the Oceanic 6... I don't care. I don't really care who made it back, I care what is going on on the island. I'm sure I'll find out who those six are, but I want to know why pregnant women die and how the crap did Locke's dad get on the island!), but I'll still watch. I own seasons one, two, and three, and I'm sure I'll own every season. And I'm crossing my fingers that the stupid writer's strike will end so my favorite show won't suffer! I love all the twists and turns and character development! Makes it hard to watch if you've never seen an episode before, but it's good stuff.

Basically, this post is just to share with you all that I will be unavailable Thursday nights. But if you don't have anything better to do, you can come over. And I'll try my best to explain what the hell is going on...