Ten years ago--I think this month, maybe May--I graduated from high school. Pretty crazy, thinking about what has happened in that time, and what I thought my life would be like when I was a recent high school graduate. It got me thinking so much about it, that I went back and read my old journal and found a couple entries that illustrate my thoughts at the time. This first one is from December.
December 3, 1998
...I think about going on a mission and about how much I don't know and I don't want to be so unprepared that I can't teach anyone. Man, a mission used to be so far off. But now I'm 18 and have already voted! Before you know it I'll be 80!I'm real worried about my future. I don't know what I want to major in in college yet. I just know that I want go. It's a little scary, but I just think I'll do like a semester of generals and then go on a mission and pray about it and stuff and see what happens. I wish I knew everything I was meant to do down here, but not knowing is part of the point, right? I kinda want to get my handwriting analyzed. I don't know what made me think of that. Well, bye.
Guess my ADD from high school has still stayed with me. And no, I never actually got my handwriting analyzed... Here's a few of my thoughts the summer after I graduated.
June 23, 1999
Well, school's out and I'm finally graduated! Wait... I graduated. I wanted to graduate? I'm going to college? How confusing life is. Well, I'm going to college at SUU and I'll be rooming with Matt Dearing, Kyle Jenson, and Trent Olsen. Psycho, huh. I still don't know what to major in. Well, high school is over. I think moving out will be good for me....
To be completely honest, I was surprised at how much stuff I wrote about the gospel and my feelings about God and the Church--there was a whole lot more from my journal I didn't post here.
I'm glad I read that journal. I go back and think about how nervous I was to go on a mission, and even with that on the near horizon, everything seemed pretty carefree. I have a journal entry that says one of my paychecks was $280, and how awesome I thought that was. Holy. Crap. I can remember how awesome I thought I was in high school. I remember having no idea what I would do in college, but not really caring too much, because I was living it up--especially that first year. But I'm glad it all happened. As it turns out, I had a pretty good head on my shoulders then. While I thought $280 bucks for 2 weeks of work was pretty great, and didn't care to declare a major, I still kept the important things in mind.
Things have really changed, and I have really changed and grown into who I am now. Ten years doesn't really seem like a lot of time, but man, thinking about it all has kinda put it in perspective. I'm so blessed to be where I am now. I'm so happy I found Hayley! She is the main reason for my happiness. I am glad to be where I am today and so blessed to be on the journey of life with Hayley. Here's to another 10 years!
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