Quick tip No. 12

If you don't immediately rinse out oatmeal from your bowl at breakfast, it will become so rock hard, you may believe it could rival cement. If you want any tiny rolled oats to be removed from the bowl after they've been allowed to dry, it will take AT LEAST two tries in the dish washer, or an hour soaking in the sink.

Toddler Brain

This may only be funny if you have a toddler... Since my kid is just starting to toddle, it's kinda funny. Maybe less so to Hayley, who has to deal with the worst parts of the tantrums, whining, "no," and all the rest much more than I do.

Image from graphjam.com

Below I have given a few updates to this graph for the Mikey brain:

• He has yet to develop the play-doh center of the Worthwhile-Food Cortex
• His Muppet-Appreciation lobe is not at all developed
• Instead of "Daddy's shoes" in the Toy-Recognition Cortex, he has developed a section for measuring cups and large serving utensils, especially spoons
• His Cartoon Addition Lobe is not fully developed 
• His Endless-Repetition Stem does not contain "The Wheels on the Bus," and "Goodnight Moon" is only part of his nighttime brain function. "No!" is definitely the dominate section of this area
• Surprisingly, his Acceptable-Medicine Center is completely normal. No aversion to actual medicines, except shots, of course

Do you see any changes you'd make? OR additional brain centers in the kids with whom you interact?

We'll get 'em next year!

Remember when I said I would try to write a novel in a month? Remember how it didn't go so well? Well, the honest truth is I quit. It was hard! I couldn't figure out what to make my characters do before they got to the big stuff I had planned for them. I would get behind and then freak out at how many extra words I'd have to write the next day to catch up. Then, I decided to bag what I had started, and do something else entirely. That didn't pan out as well as I hoped would.

image from toothpastefordinner.com

On top of the book writing stress, there were a few other things requiring my attention and they were also stressing me out. When I decided I wasn't going to write my book anymore, It was a big relief. But I do want to write that book. So as part of my resolutions for the new year, I am going to attempt NaNoWriMo again in 2012.

So there. That's my update on the writing.

In unrelated news, I figured out that I'm still logged into Hayley's YouTube account on my phone, so I posted a BUNCH of videos of Mikey there. Click the button over there on the right to see 'em.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

This is how our Thanksgiving started (sort of).

It was a very pretty start to the day, but by the end, I was pretty tired, and ready to see what tomorrow  had in store. But I get ahead of myself. Let's start at the beginning.

Mikey woke up at 2:00 a.m. He has a raging diaper rash, and also has diarrhea, which then irritates his little bum even worse. So when he woke up at two, it was because he had pooped, his bum was hurting, and he needed a new diaper. Changing the diapers when his bum is so bad (seriously, it's got bleeding sores and blotchy redness all over) is quite and ordeal. We use sensitive wipes, then cloth wipes with soap to really clean it all off, then a cloth wipe with just water to rinse it all off, then either air dry or use Hayley's hair dryer to get it good and dry, then put on the diaper, then some Nistatin cream, then this concoction made of plain yogurt (to help get rid of yeast that is making the rash worse) and Malox (to help get rid of the acid that is eating away at his bum).

Anyway, so he wakes up, we change him, I snuggle him back to sleep, then he starts crying half an hour later, we check, he pooped AGAIN, we change the diaper again, and this time he's way less inclined to sleep. I had to sit and rock him for another half hour, and at abut 3:30 a.m., I went back to sleep. Then, he woke up a little before 6:00 a.m., and we had to do another diaper change. Hayley and I tag team these diapers, because it's nice to have someone go get the soapy wipe, warm water wipe, and yogurt/Malox concoction while the other starts getting him out of pajamas to change the diaper, do the wiping, etc. The 6:00 a.m. wake up time wouldn't have been so bad, except for the issue of being up from 2-3:30 the same morning. We were tired, but still looking forward to the day!

While Mikey was up, Hayley made her super awesome green bean dish (having already made deviled eggs and a killer cheese cake the night before), and I made mashed potatoes. Sometime between Mikey's 6:00 a.m. diaper change and starting to make the food, Hayley said something to the effect of "Let's make sure we have a really good day today, ok?" To which I responded with a smile and whole-hearted agreement. My mashed potatoes were awesome, by the way.

Later, Mikey wouldn't take his nap at 9:00 a.m. like he usually does, even though at 8:30 he was beside himself, he was so tired. We wanted him to wake up at 11:00 a.m. so we could head to Tiffanie's for Thanksgiving. Well, he finally went down at about 10:30, and slept until we woke him up at noon. Because there is a huge ordeal with diaper changes, we had all sorts of stuff to take with us, and because he's getting a cold on top of the horrid diaper rash, we took the pack-n-play thinger so he would have somewhere to take a nap, so he wouldn't be such a monster all day. That totally worked and he took a great afternoon nap.

The meal at Tiff's was awesome. The turkey was great, the stuffing was great, the sweet potatoes were great, the green beans were great, the appetizers were great. It was all great. The deserts... everything! The semi-nap on the couch while watching movies and TV was good, too. Mikey started fading at about 6:30 p.m., so we started packing up all our baby things, and somehow left with more food than we brought. At home, we unpacked, then started getting Mikey ready for bed.

As I was changing his clothes, I was greeted with a treat. Mikey had a blow out. There was poop everywhere. Hayley came to help, we got him, his clothes, and the changing table cleaned up, put in the wash, gave him a bath, and got him ready for bed. After I got his diaper on, I noticed that the cotton balls that we used to dab on the yogurt/Malox had fallen behind his bed, so I bent down to get them, and while reaching under the bed, I knocked the stand that was holding the yogurt/Malox concoction, and it fell on the floor. So I had Hayley help me again with wet rags so I could clean that up, too. Then, we FINALLY got Mikey to bed!

While I was getting Mikey ready for bed (and spilling yogurt/Malox on the floor, then cleaning it up), Hayley was reclaiming the kitchen. We had left dishes from all our cooking endeavors in the sink, and the kitchen wasn't it's cleanest; not a TOTAL wreck, but not clean. Hayley was on a roll from helping with the blow out, getting things in the laundry, putting things away from the Thanksgiving visit, so she kept being productive in the kitchen. She also decided the microwave needed to be cleaned. She did this little trick where you microwave a little water with lemon oil, which helps break up all the junk in your microwave. After she had wiped down most of the microwave, she asked me to get the back wall of it, because doing so was hurting her back. I happily jumped in on the productive measures, and wiped it down. We decided that because the microwave was so gross, we'd do the little trick with the water and lemon oil again, and do a final wipe down. Well, after the stuff had been in the microwave for about 30 seconds, the door opened, the glass tray jumped, and the water and oil spilled. It scared me to death! I may or may not have cursed, and wanted toss out the thing right then and there.

After the microwave explosion, Hayley said, "What a night!" But even with the early morning wake ups, struggling naps, messy kitchen, diaper blow out, and microwave explosion, we had a great day. I had a good time with Hayley and Mikey, Tiffanie was a great hostess, and visiting with her, her family, my mom and dad, and McKay was nice. Mikey loved Tiff's dogs and hanging out with Nana and Papa, a fellow red-headed cousin, and some aunts and uncles. We had some great food. And we were thankful. It was a full day, but a great day. It goes to show that if you decide you want a nice day, you can have one. It was a really good day. Hope you had a good one, too!!

Writing marathon?

I saw this on graphjam.com. I don't know if NaNoWriMo is "high-stakes" per se, but this is how I've spent the last 5 or 6 days in relation to this little writing marathon.

Day... what is it, 6 now?

So my novel writing is not going well. It is not nearly as long as it should be by now, and I'm finding I lack motivation to do this. I am finding that my story is more of a short story than a novel. I think of ways to add to it, but I lack the desire to write about those added situations. This is all much more difficult than I thought! ...not that I thought it would be a breeze...

I start to write, but I get sick of it, get itchy all over, or can't figure out how to move the story along. I wrote a paragraph like eight times tonight and deleted it just as many times. My target should be 1,667 words per day, but I'm nowhere near that. I didn't write at all the last two days, and it is looking like I won't do much tonight, either. If I look at the word count I need to make up, it's a bit daunting. If I spread it out over the whole month, it just means I have to write 1,888 words per day instead, which is less daunting, but if I can't get 1,667 words out, how do I add 220-ish words each day from here on out??

I keep thinking maybe I should scratch this story and try something different. Something where I don't have any idea of what will happen, so I can sort of make it up more as I go along. It will mean all this writing I have done so far is wasted, but maybe it's worth it??? Thinking about it is making me itchier...

***update at 12:06 a.m. I restarted. Or rather, started something new. And I wrote over 1,900 words tonight! I might stick with this new novel. But I'm even more afraid to tell you what it's about than the last story I was working on, so... we'll see how it goes and how I feel about it in the morning.

Day 2

My second day of novel writing did not go great. I wrote more than the first day, but I'm still not at the word count I should be. I do have the excuse of stomach flu the day before yesterday and recovering still yesterday, but I need to get moving on this. I've got 1,932 words. I should be at 3,334. That means I have to catch up 1,402 words, including the additional 1,667 new words I need today. Maybe I should get one of those meter thingers to put on my side bar...

My problem right now seems to be that I don't really want to do the character building that is necessary. I want the reader (if there ever will be a reader) to already understand the characters. I'm not sure how to give them experiences that explain their thoughts and actions, so you get to know them as they exist in my head. There's a really big event going to happen at the end of Kathy's work day, but I really need to get through her work day first, giving situations that let you know what makes her tick. And I just want to skip to the event...

If any of you want to help, can you give me a description about what it's like to work in retail? Maybe working in a clothing department of a store, or something like that? That might help, actually. And I'll name a side character after you if you help. :) Hmm... maybe I'll just come to the interwebs when I need help with what to do next. So if you can, PLEASE HELP!

I think I'm doing it...

Writing that book, I mean...

My friend is also doing NaNoWriMo, and she did a post about how day one went. In order to get 50,000 words by the end of the month, you need to write 1,667 words per day. My end-of-day word count was 721. I need about a thousand more words, which means I need to make that up today. Considering everyone in my house had the stomach flu yesterday, I think I get a pass on that, but that doesn't mean I get to be the only one that writes 49,000 words in this little competition/activity. I'm having trouble getting through the first day and figuring out who these characters are and how they interact. Once I get that down, I think writing about them will be a little easier.

To tell you about my book, I don't think it's going to be a happy book. It might be a little depressing. And I'm not sure if I'm going to share it with anyone. I get very self-conscious about fiction writing. I am just fine showing what I've done for work or school, but anything I write for fun, I suddenly don't want you to not like it, because that will mean you don't like me.Or I'll take it personally, and it will create some wedge between us. Or you will like it, and will somehow know secrets about me I didn't intend to tell. But I think by the end of the month, I'll get over that. I'll let you know how things go, and if anyone really wants to read it, I'll let you. I think.

So my story. There are two main characters. Kathy and Jonathan/Jon. I keep wanting to change Jon's name, but because there has been so much advice to NOT edit and just write, he's going to be Jon at least through the end of November. So far, I have almost written John, Steve, Mark, and one other name that inspired this blog post, but now I can't remember it. They're a couple living together in Chicago who have been together for a while and it's comfortable. They might get married. But it's still a depressing story, trust me.

Is anyone else out there writing for NaNoWriMo, or doing any other writing at all? Care to share?

What if you wrote a book...

Let's say you heard about this thing where you try to write a novel in a month. Not so much based on quality, but on quantity--you just need to get the words on paper/file. You have to write 50,000 words (about 175 pages) in a month. That's about 1,667 words a day, every day, for all of November.

What would you write about?

Do you already have some story in mind, and you've never taken the time to write it? Is there something completely new, or some idea you've never expanded upon to use for this challenge? Seriously, what kind of book would you write, and what would you write about?

...and let's say I decided to do this thing. What do you think I should write about? Would you want to read all 50,000 of my words? For context, my last post was about 580 words. I'd have to write just over double that each day...

Construction

Remember how mad Mikey got at construction? Well, I'm as irate at he was tonight.

So on our way to return a couple items to the store, we were faced with even more construction on 7800 South. I was expecting this. I was even glad to see some actual progress, rather than just one strip of road ripped up and undrivable, they've ripped up half the street. It's got to start somewhere. I was prepared to wait 3 or 4 light changes to make it across the intersection; what I wasn't prepared for was the idiot moving cones.

First, let me say I have some respect for construction workers. It's hard work (while, yes, there does seem to be a lot of standing around...), and it something I wouldn't do, but I'm glad there is someone to actually do it. But this guy doesn't deserve much respect. Let me setup this story.

We were in line to turn left on New Bingham Highway, right at 4000 South in front of Target. It was about 5:00 p.m., so traffic was pretty heavy, and the line to turn left had piled up beyond the given left turn lane. This is not an unusual occurrence. Add construction to the heavy traffic and you can imagine how slow things go and how tight space is. We move 3 or 4 cars at each green light, slowly but steadily moving forward, but being completely stationary most the time. During one of those not-moving-at-all-on-a-highway moments, a less than intelligent construction worker places one of those heavy cones right in front of my car, gives no instruction--doesn't even look me in the eye--and turns around to walk back away from me toward the traffic light. I was shocked. What did he want me to do? I waved at him to try to get some instruction, but instead, he plopped the next cone in front of the car in front of me. That car made the sharp turn into the traffic lane to our right, and tried to continue moving on. I was flabbergasted. And stuck.

The construction worker just kept walking away. The traffic wasn't getting any lighter, and there were cars behind me. So I did what any sensible person would do. I put my car in park, got out, and moved the cone out of my way. The construction worker finally noticed my existence, and ever so eloquently yelled at me, "PUT IT BACK!!" Seriously? What the heck do you want me to do? Stay there all day? Do you not realize you placed a cone six inches from my bumper and gave me no other instruction on what to do about that situation? So I, with equal eloquence, yelled back to him, "YOU PUT THIS RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY CAR! WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, YOU IDIOT?!!?!" His response was again, "PUT IT BACK!!" To which I responded by getting in my car, closing my door, and driving away.

I can tolerate construction (somewhat). But this was ridiculous. I'm glad you can lift a shovel, but maybe blocking cars into  your construction zone in rush hour traffic may not help your cause, nor will it do much for the reputation of your fellow construction workers. All it would have taken to get the result you wanted was a meager point to the left (you didn't even need to make eye contact), and 6 to 12 more inches of space. Jackass.

Primary

Here's the truth: I'm not loving teaching primary. I don't like that both Hayley and I are teachers, but we're not in the same class. we're not even in the same primary group--she's in senior primary, I'm in junior. I don't like that I came in in the middle of the year, so I didn't get to be the one who lays down ground rules. I don't like that my teacher companion guy is old enough to be my dad, we don't relate to one another, he's gone all the time, is sometimes mean to the loud kid in our class, but doesn't discipline at all. I'm annoyed with the one kid that won't shut up the whole time and the girl that can't seem to keep her dress down. I'm sick of rushing through lessons that no one listens to, just to get to the coloring so they'll focus on that one thing.

I whined about all this to Hayley today, and she gave me some great advice on how to teach kids. She was sympathetic to my complaints, and understood that I want to talk to the primary presidency and have us be put together, but I think we'll hold off on it. It may not be easier to try to teach class with Mikey (we both just take him to sharing time since we're there at different hours), and if this is how we were called, maybe I need to figure out what I need to learn from this calling, and what I need to teach these kids. She pointed out that a coloring page may be age appropriate for them, but there are ways to get them to pay attention. It was a very helpful conversation, and while I still wasn't super excited about church today, I felt armed with some new tools to teach.

In class today, I did some massive positive reinforcement and it was awesome. They payed attention, they were reverent, and while I still somewhat rushed through the lesson, we got through the whole thing, and only spent ten minutes on the coloring (as apposed to the 20-30 minutes that sometimes happens). Sure, the one super talker kid wasn't there, but if the rest of them are that good next week, he'll start falling into line. I'm hopeful and actually enjoyed church today.

And I wanted to share this with you. While looking online for a coloring page, I found this gem. As you can obviously see, Jesus is the mysterious hooded one, God is the shirtless, bald guy with great abs, and the Holy Ghost is the fiery one like God, but with blank, hollow eyes. Just as I imagine the Trinity to look. Surrounded by stars and planets, like superheros. ...but to avoid parents getting all up in my grill about false doctrine and whatnot, I decided to go with something else. Hope you got a kick out of it like I did.

So here's hoping things continue to go well!

Tales from first class

I've been on a few business trips lately that were given very short notice. This usually means the flights are sold out and expensive, and all that is left is a first class seat. In addition to my first time ever in first class, I wanted to share some experiences I've had. To keep it somewhat shorter than to what I may be prone, I'll give them to you in bullets. The bullets will be followed by narrative, so if you get bored, you can skim.

• First class will change you. The first time I flew first class, I felt bad. Like I was trying to be someone I'm not, that I was slighting my fellow middle-class Americans. When they gave me a meal, I still ate it, but could NOT look at the people in coach sitting behind me. I noticeably avoided looking behind me (which is odd, because I never look behind me on a plane anyway, but this was so deliberate). I was the last seat in first class. The second time, I noticed that there were 4 other iPads up in first class. I have one, so I felt like one of the elite. I enjoyed the beverage service before the flight began. I left perfectly good pieces of melon on the lunch plate because I could. I also pitied the poor saps that had to board after me, and thought about how sad it must be to have no leg room back in coach. The saddest part is that now that my last-minute flights are done, I'll probably never ride in first class again, and I'll again be put next to a large (not chubby, but large) 6'4" dude, and try to keep my arms folded in an attempt to not touch him at all during a three hour flight (yes, that did happen).
• Everyone has a twin. In a single night, in a single restaurant, I saw the twins of a girl I worked with at my first out-of-college job (and almost waved to her and went to ask her what she was doing in Austin), a girl I knew from my freshman year of college, and a guy I knew in high school. I'm not exaggerating. Just so you know I'm not lying, the names of the real people are RB, Hayley (yep, she spells her name like Hayley), and Ryan. The doppelgangers could have stood next to the real people (the people I actually know are the real ones. Obviously.), and passed as twins.
• It is weird to eat at the bar alone and not order alcohol. But what else do you do? You can take up a whole table for a server, and get your one meal. They have to do all the same amount of work, but for half the tip, because it's just a party of one. The bar, on the other hand, is full service like a table, but it's the freakin' bar. And you're the weirdo that says, "Now that you've explained the great, happy hour deals on shots, beers on tap, and colorful mixed drinks, I'm going to go a head and order a water." When eating alone, I often get a soda solely because I feel I owe it to the server to get something that costs money so their tip will be bigger.
• Austin, TX has lots of christian rock stations, Latin stations, and country stations. I surfed through the radio stations and found a TON of christian rock. Or christian talk, with rock mixed in. I'm not going to lie, I sat and listened a while. If I lived there, I may or may not want at least one on a preset. Just for kicks. On a related note, there are also tons of country music stations and Hispanic music stations. And only two alternative rock stations, and one of those has poor reception. The one that I've taken a liking to has a British lady on the morning show, and likes to play a LOT of Hoobastank. I heard no less than three Hoobastank songs on the way back to the hotel one night.
• Everyone obeys the speed limit in Austin. Seriously, there are very few that speed. In SLC, people go 75 mph on the freeway and don't bat an eye, and if you're not going at least 5 over, EVERYONE is passing you. In Austin, there are sections where the limit is 55, and everyone complies. I like it. It may be because they have a zillion cops on the roads. All the roads. At all times.

Maybe we're ALL a bit narcissistic

So I was listening to the radio today, and the song "Good Life" by Onerepublic came on. I like the song, and it has even made it onto a CD of favorites that is currently in the car. So I continue listening, singing along because I'm alone in the car and can shout at the top of my lungs, and it gets to this part:

To my friends in New York, I say hello
My friends in L.A., they don't know
Where I've been for the past few years or so....

and so on. Well, to my surprise, some of the lyrics were changed. Instead, it goes like this:

To my friends in New York, I say hello
My friends in UTAH, they don't know
Where I've been for the past few years or so...

and so on. I don't know if you noticed the subtle difference.

It's like, all us folks listening in Utah are supposed to look at each other with super excited grins, saying "Hey, hheeeeeeyyyyy, HEY! Yeah, yeah yeah!! YEAH!" to each other while nodding our heads like this is the greatest thing that ever happened.

Look, I know Utah is not really going to be so inspiring to the likes of Onerepublic that it will get a melodic shout out. Maybe by the Beach Boys, sure. But not Onerepublic. There are LOTS of places that don't get shoutouts. New York, Los Angeles, Paris, etc., sure, they get mentioned. Those of us in other towns don't really take offense to not being mentioned by mainstream musicians. But are we gullible enough and narcissistic enough to really be excited when bands change the lyrics to songs to make us feel like they really love us?

Welcome to the hotel, Arizona!
Just a city boy, born and raised in South Houston
I left my heart in Springfield

Come on. Those aren't the lyrics and we know it, and I find the changes annoying. Just leave it as is. Onerepublic (or maybe the DJs that changed the lyrics), I know you don't have any friends in Utah. But we'll listen to your music. It's still good without mention of salty lakes, snow, or canyon lands. You don't have to fake it.

A bit narcissistic?

I don't know how it happened, but somehow I "followed" my own blog. It's the only blog listed on my profile as a blog I follow, even though there are over 100 blogs in my google reader--and this somehow made a "blogs I'm following" folder in my reader, too. I don't want my own blog listed as a followed blog on my profile! Nor do I want this extra folder in reader. Anyone know how to remove it?

So mad!!

Mikey gets so mad sometimes! Not really, it's like he's playing at yelling. Because we'll both laugh, and he keeps doing it. Hayley posted some pictures of how mad he gets. I recorded this video and started asking his opinion on a few things. Seems like between the GOP depates [sic], the state of the economy, and potholes, the thing that gets Mikey most riled up is potholes. Take a look. (And please excuse the camera work. I was holding the camera away from him, so he'd still look at me or Hayley, and it went a little off to the side at times.)

Woah!!

When Mikey gets too excited, he's started saying, "Woah!" a whole buncha times. It's dang cute. In the tub tonight, he was going nuts! I pulled out my phone and took this video, and of course because there was a camera, he didn't do it quite so much. This video does, however, show a few other Mikey-isms.

• 0:03 -- you can see and hear him do this little mouth grunty noise he makes when he's hungry. I can't even mimic the sound
• 0:15 and 1:35 -- he claps with toys in his hands
• 0:31 -- he sorta does his "woah!"
• 0:44 -- he does a fake cough
• 0:47 -- he lets out a loud "aaahhhhhh"
• 1:42 -- he gets so excited, he has to smile big, kick his feet, and bounce
• 1:50 -- he gives a better "woah! woah!"
• 2:06 -- his dad says "oh, goodness" in baby talk for the billionth time
• 2:16 -- he gives a little more concerned "woah!"

Yeah... I know I'm a dork, but I just love everything about this kid!

Quick tip No. 11

Wikipedia is really all about philosophy.


I just found this out from xkcd.com; specifically, this comic's alt tag text.

"Wikipedia trivia: if you take any article, click on the first link in the article text not in parenthesis or italics  and then repeat, you will eventually end up at Philosophy."

I tried it twice. With the speed of light (took 8 clicks), and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (took 15 clicks), and it totally happened. (As a side note, what does it say about me that those were the first two articles I searched for when testing this hypothesis? Your comments are appreciated.)

The Brain

So the iPad has that weirdy setting for taking pictures that distorts everything, right? Well, I took a picture of Mikey a while ago, and it totally looked like The Brain (from Pinky and The Brain). What do you think?

Quick tip No. 10

When using eye drops (or having someone else put them in because you can't bring yourself to put drops in your own eyes) it is probably best not to close your eyes so tight your lashes can barely be seen, or to shake your head back and forth so your eyes are inaccessible.

Hayley does this. It's kinda funny. But she has pink eye, the poor thing, so I have to put eye drops in her eyes 4 times a day. I seem to have to remind her a few times that I don't even have the lid off of the dropper.

Happy Mother's Day, Hayley!

I just love ya! You're the best Momma for Mikey boy that could ever be. You love him so much, it's palpable at times. Just the mere thought of him can make you cry, laugh, or just smile. You love him, smile at him, play with him, feed him, change him, and protect him. You let him nap on you, play with you (even when he gets rough and goes for the face), and you can tell how much he loves you. You don't need to do anything but walk in the room and that little guy lights up, smiles, laughs, and gets so excited he can't help but get those hands and feet going.

We love you so much and hope you have a great day today!

Love,

Your boys.

And here's one of my favorite videos of all time. 

Heaven Tetris

There's a web comic I read called xkcd.com. You should check it out. The guy posted this a few days ago:

And then some genius internet person made this:

Enjoy my friends. Enjoy.

***UPDATE*** I un-posted this because the dang embedded thinger wasn't working... is it working for anyone here? If not, go to this site: http://www.gudmagazine.com/games/heaven/

Grammar Nazi

Ok, there's a site called ParentsShouldntText.com that features the technological blunders some parents face when dealing with smart phones and stupid autocorrect. Some of them are silly. Some of them just highlight the typical attitudes of parents. This one showed up today, and I needed to share. I love it.

Tubby Time

I flopped the wash cloth on Mikey's head last night. He thought it was funny, then just went about his business splashing in the tub. I told Hayley to grab the camera, and then I took a few pictures. I like this little boy, let me tell ya.

Here are a few without the flash and trying to learn to use our camera.

 

 

 And here are a few with full auto.

 

Teen Mom

When Hayley was pregnant, she somehow became aware of the show "16 and Pregnant." I watched it a couple of times, but it made me so angry at these stupid teenage kids that I finally had to tell her to watch it without me. The kids in the show have made decisions beyond their maturity level and demand to be treated like "adults," yet still live with their parents, don't pay bills, don't work, are in no way trying to better their situation, and still act like kids. The worst part, in my opinion, is that a new show blossomed from "16 and Pregnant" called "Teen Mom," which documents and follows the stories of the dumbass kids that can't figure out how to be parents now that this baby has inconvenienced their lives. (On a related note, life is so unfair. These ill-equiped children have babies because they can't keep their legs crossed, yet friends of mine struggle months and years to have a baby. But that's another topic for another day.)

I'm not against teenagers acting like teenagers. When I was a teenager, I did many things that were completely stupid that I thought were perfectly rational. Like let girls put over 200 rubber bands in my hair on a tour bus just before a marching band competition, or ditch a school assembly to play Golden Eye in my parents' basement, or force my friends to jump out of my car as I slowed down in front if their houses so I wouldn't have to stop and worry that the engine would die because I didn't put enough oil in it. All of these things would (and did) make my parents shake their heads at me or want to ground me. In all fairness, they would have been within their rights to ground me--there ARE consequences to stupid teenage choices after all. You can teach all you want, but even if your kid farts rainbows, they're going to do some stupid thing as a teenager. It's part of life and growing.

But once you become a parent--teenaged or not--you're not the most important thing on the planet anymore. You have to make sacrifices so that tiny little human can survive. That means you don't get to go to late night parties and leave your child unsupervised in a crib. You have to give up some sleep so you can take care of the needs of a little person who can't take care of himself. Figuring out how to feed, clothe, care for, and keep that baby clean become priorities. If you decide to have a baby and keep it, that is a very grown up decision with very grown up consequences. All these dumb kids are so surprised when they figure it out. If they figure it out. And it's SO infuriating to watch!!

I don't know what my deal is these days... everything that seems to give kids a false sense of reality and promotes not only selfishness and bad morals, but blatant disregard for common sense just seems to get under my skin more and more. Who am I kidding, I know exactly what my deal is. His name is Mikey. It all just makes me more determined to teach him right from wrong and hopefully instill a moral code in him that will help him avoid the stupidest decisions (like alcohol, drugs, or premarital sex), and prepare me for the lesser stupid decisions (like jumping from trees, wearing pajamas to school, or giving himself blonde highlights Saturday night, and only telling me and Hayley about it an hour before church on Sunday).

And now to the inspiration for this post. I saw this graphic today. Alls I wanted to do was post it so you could laugh, too, but then this long blog post resulted. Again, brevity is not one of my strong suits. :)

Lazy Sunday

Wake up in the late afternoon...

I have an urge to blog. But I have no real reason to. No pictures. Nothing specific to say. So here is a seemingly random string of thought for you... or just me. In bullet form.

• There were two pictures I contemplated posting. As a sort of "Wordless Wednesday" (but not on Wednesday) post. I didn't post them.
• I wonder how you play Cover the Orange.
• Golden Eye is fun. But I don't really want to play it.
• Weight Watchers works pretty good. I lost over 9 lbs. this week. That'd be more impressive if I wasn't so large right now, but it still pretty great.
• I don't like when the weekend is over.
• I do like Sunday naps.
• I've been listening to one of Katy Perry's albums for a couple days. There's a song with this line: "You're from a whole nuther world." I've thought of two or three alternate sentences that have the same number of syllables, fit the song's rhythm, but are grammatically correct and don't contain fake words like "nuther."
• I kind of want chocolate, but I've used up all my points today, so I'm going to have a "treat water" which is a generic Crystal Lite single serve thinger.

That's it. Off to make my treat water.

A couple Mikey vids

If you don't regularly check out our YouTube channel, what's wrong with you? No, but you're missing out on some grade A awesomeness. Seriously. This is Mikey just after a bath, checking himself out in the mirror, drooling on his newly cleaned baby chest.


And this one is him playing baby piano on iPad.


See the kind of awesome you're missing?

"I'll show YOU who's got whose nose!!"

What would you title this playlist?

Hayley made this playlist, and it's really good music. She has a great name for the playlist, but I wanted to see what other folks might call it. So, if you can guess what Hayley named it, or if we like your choice enough to change the name Hayley already gave it, you get a prize. Seriously. If you win, I'll ask for your address and send you a prize. Because I'm all about prizes and giveaways on my blog. Anyway, here are the songs:

• Jar of Hearts - Christina Perri
• Secrets - OneRepublic
• Chasing Pavements - Adele
• Parachute - Ingrid Michaelson
• Fallin' - Alicia Keys
• You and Me - Dave Matthews Band
• Forget You - Cee Lo Green
• Holding Us Back - Katie Herzig
• Turn to Stone - Ingrid Michaelson
• No One - Alicia Keys
• Back to Black - Amy Winehouse
• If I Were A Boy - Beyonce
• Skinny Love - Bon Iver
• What Can I Say - Brandy Carlile
• Warning Sign - Coldplay
• Put Me Down - The Cranberries
• I Will Follow You Into The Dark - Death Cab For Cutie
• The Sound of Settling - Death Cab For Cutie
• Shadowboxer - Fiona Apple
• Paper Bag - Fiona Apple
• Dog Days Are Over - Florence & The Machine
• Cosmic Love - Florence & The Machine
• Cryinig Shame - Jack Johnson
• Star Mile - Joshua Radin
• Sky - Joshua Radin
• Unlike Me - Kate Havnevik
• Somewhere Only We Know - Keane
• Because of You - Kelly Clarkson
• Save You - Mathew Perryman Jones
• All About Your Heart - Mindy Gledhill
• Anyone Else But You - The Moldy Peaches
• The Cave - Mumford & Sons
• So What - P!nk
• Nightswimming - R.E.M.
• Australia - The Shins
• Silent All These Years - Tori Amos
• Confessions Part II - Usher
• Gotta Have You - The Weepies

There ya go. What would you name this playlist? And maybe, what would you add to it?

Mmmm, carrots

Mikey got his first taste of carrots last night. I never thought of carrots having a strong flavor, but when all you ever eat is milk with the occasional super mushed up rice, I guess the flavor might be strong. :) Check out 0:45, 0:55, 1:16, and 1:59 for some really great faces.



Also, if you haven't checked out our youtube channel in a while, you really should. There are some great videos of Mikey there. (click here in case you're looking at this in a reader and can't click the button to the right)

Bullying

Someone shared this video on facebook...

What do you think?

I'm a horrible person

First, I participated in a facebook fight about how "boughten" isn't a word, and now this...

Remember a few years ago when I got a text from someone I didn't know? Remember my regret at "[missing] out on a good opportunity to mess with the minds of strangers" and all that? Well lucky me, I got a text from a stranger on my lunch break, and took a little time to mess with him/her. Here's the conversation:

Person I Don't Know: Hi Koriann. what's the name of the new lady at the library ... she's only been working there for a coule months,
Me: Bertha.
PIDK: her name wasn't bertha ... she is in charge of teaching the classes on "how to use the library" ... she came from california
Me: Oooohh... Stacy?
PIDK: nope ... i think she might be over the front desk
Me: Did she order a salad for lunch today?
PIDK: who am i texting?
Me: Not korrian. Sorry. I have no idea who you are. Can you blame me for messing with you?
PIDK: nope ... sorry for wasting your time
Me: No problem. Sorry for wasting yours. :) hope you find that lady's name.

Again, this is a complete transcript of the texts, so yes, she spelled couple as coule, and I spelled Koriann wrong. but moving on.

When PIDK said sorry for wasting my time, I felt a little bad so I wished her luck. But I sure didn't feel bad enough to not do this again when I get another text from an unknown source.

Poop

This post is seriously and literally (used with its correct meaning) about poop. It's Mikey's poop I'd like to address, so at least there's that. But if you're grossed out, my feelings won't be hurt if you sit this one out. However, to encourage you to continue on, it's not that long and I won't be posting pictures.

About a week ago, Mikey started having rice cereal twice a day. Since then his poop has slowly started to change. Of course, he started with the newborn meconium (tar consistency with no strong smell, if I recall correctly). But he has moved from the yellow, with looks-like-sesame-seeds-but-really-it's-curdled-milk clumps that almost smells like buttery popcorn, into what he's pooping now, which is about the consistency of wet cement and has an unmistakable this-is-poop smell. (All you other parents, tell me I don't have the poop descriptions spot-on?) It's just another sign he's getting bigger. And leaves me none too excited for when he starts trying other foods that may will leave his diaper smelling a tad more pungent.

Happy birthday, Hayley!

I tend to get long winded. So here are the main things I want to say, in a bulleted list. Because bullets calm me down and make what I have to say a little less wordy.

• I hope you have the best birthday you could ever have. 
• You're my favorite person and you deserve a great birthday!
• I love you so much! 
• I can be exactly myself with you, and you love me back. 
• We are best friends, and can do anything together. 
• Even just sit and do nothing.
• You're my baby mama! 
• You brought Mikey to us, and you are the best mother in the world to him. 
• How much you love him and care for him just builds up how much I love you! 
• I love our little family!

I love ya, Hayley. Here's to many more birthdays together. :)

Quick tip No. 9

If you feel like you have something in your teeth, you probably do.

Disappointed in Glee

This post is going to say a couple of things beyond what I want to get at, so let's address those things first so we can get to the nitty gritty. Yes, I watch Glee. Yes, I enjoy it. Yes, I also like musicals--in fact, being in the pit orchestra for my high school's production of Guys and Dolls was pretty sweet. I realize all these things may make you question my manhood. Go ahead and question it. I'm comfortable enough to admit these things (also that I don't follow any professional sport, don't have a gun, don't see the point in owning a truck when I live in the city [but having friends who have trucks is nice when the occasion calls for it], I like to cook, I like Alanis Morissette and Tori Amos, and--while I'm still able to kill them--spiders freak me out), and I still don't feel the need to figure out sports statistics because you might tease me if I don't know anything about sports (though I'll still say the Chicago Bears are my favorite team, even if I don't even know the name of their quarterback). I'm comfortable in my skin. Also, when I rant, my blog posts are really long. So now let's move on.

Glee the other night was a huge disappointment. The singing was fun and all, but the overall message was that teenage drinking is fine, except when it makes you throw up. The producers and writers of the show thought it was ok to show high school kids drinking at parties (where the kids broke into the parent's liquor cabinet to get plastered), in the halls of school, and while performing at an assembly in school, and have no repercussions whatsoever. Oh, except for hangovers and throwing up.

That's not the biggest disappointment, either. None of the adults could offer any reasons why teenage kids shouldn't drink. The biggest argument the kids could provide was, "You adults drink to take off the edge or have fun, so why can't we?" In the end, the only resolution to this argument was, "Well, I'll stop drinking then, too." While I'm all for abstaining from alcohol at any age, I'm not naïve enough to think that everyone stays stone cold sober all the time, and many people do drink responsibly. So to those who may eventually drink in their lifetime, it might be better to give stronger arguments against underage drinking than I'll-stop-drinking-if-that-makes-you-stop-drinking. Because if you drink alcohol as an adult who has influence over kids, there is a likelihood that there are other adults in the lives of the kids you're trying to influence who also drink. And you can't make EVERYONE in the world stop drinking all at once. Remember Prohibition? The world just isn't ready for that.

So, Glee, while I don't mind that the weekly stories often have holes or don't really make sense, and any viewer with half a brain can see that all you're trying to do is figure out some way to transition from Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" to Britney Spears's "Toxic," at least TRY to do a little research before treating underage alcohol abuse so lightly. There are, in fact, MUCH WORSE outcomes to underage drinking than just headaches and upset stomachs. Here are a few:

• In 2006, more than 19% of drivers ages 16 to 20 who died in motor vehicle crashes had been drinking alcohol.*
• The younger you are when you start drinking, the greater your chance of becoming addicted to alcohol at some point in your life. More than 4 in 10 people who begin drinking before age 15 eventually become alcoholics.**
• Underage drinking is a leading contributor to death from injuries, which are the main cause of death for people under age 21. Each year, approximately 5,000 persons under the age of 21 die from causes related to underage drinking. These deaths include about 1,600 homicides and 300 suicides.***
• Long-term risks of alcohol use include liver damage, pancreatitis, certain cancers, and literal shrinkage of the brain.****
• Studies with animals and alcohol dependent adolescents show that alcohol has the potential to impact adolescent brain development. Given recent research which shows that the human brain continues to develop throughout adolescence, we need to better understand the short- and longterm effects of alcohol on the developing brain. (Basically, the human brain is still developing even when you're a teenager. Alcohol can screw up how your brain develops and damage it irreparably, especially if you binge drink like the kids on Glee were doing)***
• Youth who drink alcohol are more likely to experience school problems, such as higher absence and poor or failing grades; social problems, such as fighting and lack of participation in youth activities; legal problems, such as arrest for driving or physically hurting someone while drunk; physical problems, such as hangovers or illnesses; unwanted, unplanned, and unprotected sexual activity; disruption of normal growth and sexual development; physical and sexual assault; higher risk for suicide and homicide; alcohol-related car crashes and other unintentional injuries, such as burns, falls, and drowning; memory problems; abuse of other drugs; changes in brain development that may have life-long effects; death from alcohol poisoning.*****

What I listed above were just things I know about, but now have sources to back up my knowledge. Check out the references below to find out even more crap that can happen to underage drinkers.

Finding these resources wasn't hard, Glee writers. Come on. Everyone knows that teenage drinking is a big deal. We know your key demographic probably consists of teenagers that want to be cool but may not be very popular, so you don't want to make them change the channel if they feel like they're getting some kind of lecture, but seriously, all you could come up with is to make the Glee coach say he wasn't going to drink either? No mention of liver disease, brain development, alcohol poisoning leading to death, or anything?? It was all a big game to these kids, and there were no consequences. In real life, almost half of these kids would go to binge drinking parties again, become addicts, and ruin their lives.

The Glee kids drank on multiple occasions AT SCHOOL, and no one was even sent to detention. Their teacher knew about a few occasions of the drinking, and not only didn't do anything to stop it, he didn't give them any kind of consequence for BREAKING THE LAW. (As a side note, Hayley and I have steeper consequences for the kids in our Sunday school class who talk too much during a lesson!) At the very least, the kids should have been suspended. In my opinion, they should have been suspended, banned from regionals or sectionals or whatever (I watch mostly just for the singing and the quirky, mean wit of Sue Sylvester, I can't be bothered with details like the name of the competition), and required to attend some kind of underage alcohol education course to be held after school hours. Expulsion wouldn't really be out of the question. But that would make for bad TV, wouldn't it.

Underage alcohol use is a big deal, Glee. There is a lot more at stake than just hangovers and puking in public. Next time, be a little more adult about how you deal with issues that result in the deaths of thousands of Americans each year.

I'm still trying to decide if I should stop watching the show altogether because of that episode...

*http://www-nrd.nhtsa.dot.gov/Pubs/810801.PDF
**http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/aa59.htm
***http://www.nih.gov/about/researchresultsforthepublic/UnderageDrinking.pdf
****http://www.teendrugabuse.us/teensandalcohol.html
*****http://www.cdc.gov/alcohol/fact-sheets/underage-drinking.htm
(The links to Glee are left out on purpose. You'll find the show if you want to, but I don't need to promote it on my blog right now...)

Stupid ear holes...

Mikey and I have ear infections. I think I gave him the sick I got. I'm pretty sure I got it from the plane ride back from my last work trip to Austin. The day after I got home, I started getting a sore throat, started losing my voice, and got all congested. The day after I started feeling sick, Mikey started getting congested and coughing, too. Hayley started getting a little congested a couple days after that. Then last night, poor little Mikey cried for four hours. We're new at this, so we didn't take him right to the doctor, but later on came to our senses.

When we got home from my parents' place (we're having a little stay-cation because the cabin we were all going to go to had some frozen pipes and flooding. So sad!), I FINALLY got the little guy calmed down enough to sleep. By then, the pediatrician on call had called us back, and recommended taking him to insta-care. I was really torn because he was finally asleep, but we decided to just take him in. He slept on the way there, slept through most of his exam, and slept in the car while we waited for his prescription (with a little help from his Baby Mine Lullabyes CD and driving laps around the parking lot now and then). When we got home, he woke up, so we gave him his first dose of meddies, and got him back to sleep. He woke up an hour or so after that, and then about two hours after that. It was a rough night--especially because we're used to him sleeping for 10 to 12 hours at night.

This morning was a little better. He cried waking up, but I eventually got him to smile at me! Yesterday, it took a lot to get him to smile, when all I usually need to do is say, "Hi!" or, "Mikey boy!" and he's so excited, his arms start flailing. He's now had two doses of his meddies, and is feeling better. He just woke up from a little nap, so he's having brunch. We're hoping his appetite starts coming back, too. That'd mean lunch is in a couple hours.

My doctor's appointment is later today. Hopefully, we'll all start feeling better soon!

Fun with neti pots

Before seeing an episode of Cougar Town, I didn't even know what a neti pot was. Bobby was a little skeptic at first, but then finally tried it out. See?



(The "Hero" song playing in the background makes more sense if you watch the full episode...)

Then, a day or so ago, one of my friends on facebook said how glad she was she had a neti pot, or what a life saver it was or something. So I had to ask if it really worked. She said it was great. Didn't take away your cold if you have one, but it lets you breathe for while.

I did a little online research (consisting of googling "neti pot," visiting two sites, and watching one online instructional video) and found out people have been using them for a long time, and they can help clear sinuses when you have allergies, too. So I asked Hayley if she's ever used one, and she looked at me like I was crazy, then composed herself a little more and said, "No, but Heather and her family use one." Now I was more intrigued. So when I went to get milk last night, I checked out the neti pot isle, and decided to try it out.

It definitely feels weird the first time or two, but you can breathe after! With this cold I've had since getting home from my last work trip, I've been trying to keep my voice and be able to breathe. This little pot totally helps. If you were skeptic before (or had never heard of the thing like me), come on over and I'll let you try it out.

And for your viewing pleasure, here is me trying it out for the first time. I was pretty sure it needed to be documented and shared on the interwebs.

Oh, and I made Hayley do it, too. And I recorded it. :)



Happy Valentine's Day!

I love you, Hayley! I love that we can spend so much time together, and have fun.

I think we sat in Mikey's room switching out his small clothes for ones that fit for like an hour, and it was time well spent together.

I'm grateful to have you in my life, and watch how great you are with Mikey. I just love you! Mikey loves you, too. He told me so.

Hope you have a wonderful day today!

What does an English degree do for you anyway?

Hayley is reading a book called House Rules. It's a Jodi Picoult book about a kid with aspergers. She laughed at a couple paragraphs and read them to me, and I thought it was pretty spot on.

I graduated with honors from the University of Vermont with a degree in English. Here’s a little nugget of wisdom for you just in case you’re interested: you can’t practice English in the real world. What skills did I have, honestly? I could outread anyone in a quick draw? I could write a totally smoking analytical essay about the homoerotic overtones of Shakespeare’s sonnets?

Yeah, that and a dollar fifty will get you a cup of coffee.

Luckily, I added the "with emphasis in professional and technical writing" to my English degree. That has made quite a difference in my life. But don't get me started on how incompetent I think my professors were... that's a rant for a different day.

Best Laughing ever!

Mikey gets so excited in this video, he's screaming! It's pretty awesome. Most of you may have already seen this, but it's one of my favorite videos, so I'm posting it. So there.

I wish that blog was my idea

You may not want to share the following picture with your children, especially if they can read.




So here is some space to allow you to have them turn their heads while you read this post, especially if they were in the room with you.





Today, I saw this picture and nearly crapped my pants laughing. I can't put a finger on exactly why I think it's so funny, but it really is to me.

If you've never heard of Hyperbole and a Half, you really should check it out. Be forewarned: she's sometimes a potty mouth (as you can guess from this picture). You can read her post about animals here. Just add it to your reader if you haven't already. Hayley's already endorsed it, so just do it. Do it.

Shenanigans

Ok, I'm going to share some things that will probably make my parents not only roll their eyes, but be slightly disappointed, then be glad I didn't get caught and came out unscathed. My parents probably know the truth about all these stories--because parents aren't as dumb as their kids think--but this still gives me the feeling I'm confessing sins here. I'll try to be brief, but as we all know, brevity is not a strong suit of mine. I like to tell stories with lots of detail.

The Tractor
The house I grew up in had a huge field behind it. Many of my friends' back yards were accessible by crossing the field, or following the ditch that ran behind all the houses. We would play hid 'n seek, guns, fly kites, throw snowballs, and have a general good time out in that field. There was a tractor out there, however, that we were instructed never to go near. I'm not sure what kind of tractor it was, but it wasn't the normal farming kind; it had some big compartment for storing stuff, some belts and pulleys, and I don't even remember where you would sit when you drove it. I think it was more some add on to some larger trator used for sugar beat farming. (Ward siblings, maybe you know?) Anyway, I don't know what the deal was with it, but it just sat out there, not used, getting rusty and taunting the imaginations of the neighborhood children. Thus begin the shenanigans.

Contrary to the advice  of our parents (coupled with crippling consequences like having the Nintendo taken away), there were a few of us brave enough to play on the tractor. I remember being told if I did play on the tractor, I could fall, break my neck, be stuck there with no help, die, get tetanus or lockjaw from looking at it too long, etc. We climbed on it, played in it, and even wondered at the blankets we found inside (possibly belonging to homeless people who slept in it at night). I'm not saying we didn't get mildly hurt and scratched, but we'd be damned if we told our parents that's where the scrapes came from.

Golden Eye
This story only requires a couple items for back story. First, yes, I was into video games as a kid/teenager. I was NOT good at the shooter games, but had fun playing them. I was also not a big sluffer (sorry Hayley, I'm keeping this true to life. While I know you hate the term "sluf," that's what we called ditching class.) and mostly went to every class on time.

One day, however, there was some assembly that was going to take up the last three class periods. Someone had brought his N64 to school with the intent to take it to a friends house for a weekend-long Golden Eye-fest. Someone in a group of band geeks suggested it would be more fun to play Golden Eye than go to the stupid assembly, so I immediately offered up my house as a place we could go. We piled into Wyatt Barrett's mini-van, and sluffed the assembly. We were happily shooting each other in the virtual face, when suddenly I hear my dad's car pull in the driveway.

My immediate thought was something like, "We can sneak out the windows when he comes in the back door!" But that would not explain the giant mini-van parked in the driveway, so I had to figure something else out. Everyone else was freaking out a little, because I had told them that both my parents work and wouldn't be home until after school got out. I then went straight upstairs, looked my dad in the neck region (because who can lie to their dad in the eye), and said, "Hi, how was work? ...there was an optional assembly at school, so we decided not to go... but we're going to head back... uh... for band practice, so see ya!" And we piled back into Wyatt's mini-van, and went to his older brother's friends' house to keep playing.

The BioTech Center
At least that's where I THINK this last bit of shenanigans took place. This is one I don't think my parents know about. Unless I've told them the story already.

My senior year of college, I had a roommate name Marcus Aurelius. ("You knew Marcus Aurelius?" Name that  movie.) Ok, not really, but that's what I called him, and subsequently, so did the rest of our roommates. Mark was having a little identity crisis. I tried to be a good friend, but I was nearing the end of that not-true-to-real-life-in-any-way period of time known as college, and trying to figure out where I was supposed to fit in society and life in general. In trying to get through this period of time, I wasn't always the beacon of reason myself, and fell into some of Marcus Aurelius's  plots. One of which was to see what buildings on campus are slightly accessible in the middle of the night.

We totally broke into the BoiTech Center. Again, I'm not sure that was the building, but we jumped over this fence, onto some mechanical devices covered by sheet metal, climbed down the devices, and into an unlocked maintenance door. Once inside, we found that various rooms were unlocked because the rest of the building was secure. It was then I realized that were I ever to be homeless, I would move to Logan, because not only could I sleep on a soft couch at night, the HYPR building was available during the day for showers, with no supervision or regulation on who accesses the facilities. That night, we also got into the English building (not very hard. The doors were wide open.) which then granted access to the Family Life building.

All we did was walk around and see who had offices that were unlocked. But the whole time, the voice of reason inside me was saying, "This is ridiculous. Probably the stupidest thing you've ever done. Even if you're not doing anything, if you get caught, you have ONE semester left to graduate, and you could get kicked out of this school. Do you REALLY want to suffer through more college classes?" It was really dumb. And just one of those things stupid college kids do when they're bored in the middle of the night and don't want to actually go to sleep.

Well, that's all for me. Care to share any of your shenanigans?

Spitty McSpitterton

Mikey is learning how to give raspberries. He's cute. That second video has more spitting. There's spit running all down his face.

Word association

Caron beat me to this one, but oh well. This'll be fun. She gave a link to a random word generator, so I clicked on it and I'm going to give the first memories that come to mind when I think of these words.

1. Cream
I've made these super great nachos a couple of nights for dinner. I put sour cream on top while they're still warm out of the oven, and the sour cream sorta melts all over the place. Tasty tasty. The nachos consist of chips, cheese, totinos jalapeno cheese dip, salsa, homemade spicy salsa, black beans, and fajita-seasoned chicken.

2. Concierge
I've never really had any experience with a concierge, but I remember that episode of the office when Micheal Scott goes on a business trip, and thinks the Concierge is some kind of Geisha/hooker. Very awkward and very funny.

3. Moustache
I don't really like growing facial hair. I've never tried to grow a moustache, but I've tried to grow a beard, and I hate it. I think most moustaches look awful.

4. Whiteboard
At my last job, I had a large white board, and so did the other Proposal Writer. The other guy NEVER used his white board, and so I would mess with him, and when he wasn't at his desk, I'd leave pictures or to do lists. Like, "Milk, eggs, punch Andy in the face, 7 lbs of hamburger, wash car, fight crime, do dishes." Some of those are funnier because he was also vegan. I posted a couple times on whiteboard shenanigans, too.

To finally clear things up

Related to #6 on my last post

Just found this. It's awesome.

Strong opinions

I don't really have many super strong opinions... do I? First order of business: all y'all that read this blog, comment on and point out my strong opinions in the comments. Second order of business: I'll try to think harder. Third order of business: once you've read my opinions, share yours in the comments.

• Opinion #1 - Orange is the best color. For EVERYTHING.
• Opinion #2 - You shouldn't swear in a church, synagogue, or any place of worship. Show some dang respect. And if you do, even if it's at a basketball game for a ward that isn't even in my stake, I'll tell you to not swear in church.
• Opinion #3 - Chubby people and spandex don't mix.
• Opinion #4 - You should always have your wrist strap on when playing Wii. 
• Opinion #5 - My wife is the best and my son is the cutest.
• Opinion #6 - (late entry of my own, and so denoted in orangey-brown) I'm really bugged by people who post all sorts of crap/links on facebook complaining about the government, conspiracies, how awful education is, the evils of consumerism, the evils of capitalism, the evils of socialism, etc. and don't do anything but bitch about it on facebook. You look like an asshat if alls you're gonna do is whine about it and share obscure news articles. Are you doing anything about your zillion causes? Are you avidly writing your congressmen? Hosting rallies? If not, what is the point of all the doomsday sharing on facebook? (sorry for all the cussing on this one, but i'm not in a church, or other place of worship, so I excuse myself.)
• Opinion #7 - (stolen from Caron, who also blogged her list of opinions) Before giving a chruch talk, I HATE when people say they didn't prepare, or didn't have time to prepare, or were called saturday night... sure you were busy or weren't given advance notice, but if you don't tell me that, I would never know and the spirit of doubt wouldn't have entered me, and I wouldn't hate your talk... just sayin'.
• Opinion #8 - You don't need to wear your sunglasses inside. You aren't a rockstar.

That's really all I got... If I deem your comment to be a true strong opinion of mine, I'll add it to my list. :) Additions will be denoted in text of different colors.

Today was a great day

Lots happened today. First, happy anniversary to Hayley!! Two years has flown by. It has been the best two years of my life, and while I'm inclined to say it couldn't get better, I really know it will. We will continue to love each other, watch Mikey grow, watch our family grow, and wonder where the time went. All the while, I get to spend every day with my best friend in the whole world, and enjoy every moment. Thanks, Hayley, for being the best thing that ever happened to me.

I don't want to detract from how much I love Hayley and how happy this two years has been, so the rest will be a bulleted list. And one picture I really want to share.

• We went to get "jammie pictures" with Mikey's cousins.
• We went to Chili's for a little anniversary lunch.
• We went to a movie. In the movie theater!
• We came home and relaxed. Hayley got a little back rub, Mikey slept lots, and we just hung out.
• It was reaffirmed to me that while Mikey is my little "mini-me," he has some of his momma's tendencies.

Regarding that last bullet, Hayley sometimes sleeps with her eyes open. IT FREAKS ME OUT. It makes me do the silent scream. You know, where something is creepy, so you have to react accordingly, but you oddly don't want the creepiness to end, so you don't want to startle it away. Well, Mikey sometimes does the same thing. And I do the silent scream when he does it, too. Mostly because he's actually asleep and I don't want to wake him up (or face Hayley's wrath were I to wake him), so the appropriate response is silent screams.

Lately, zombies have been something we've talked about a lot for various reason. (this is a related statement, I swear. Just wait for it.) Today, Mikey did the scary eyes-open-while-sleeping trick, and I did the silent scream. I also told Hayley, "If anyone in this family has a natural immunity to the zombie virus, it's me, because you two don't have a hope! You've already got crazy zombie eyes!" Check out Mikey's picture of the day:

He's asleep. Out cold. The open eyes looking at me while I hold him are a little creepy. Am I the only one that thinks so? Other than that, he's a-freakin'-dorable... and actually, because it's like his momma, I still think it's adorable.

But back to today. Happy anniversary, Hayley. I love you, and I love our little life.